I had already heard some negative things about this film before even stepping foot in the theater, so I wasn’t really expecting much. I knew that the Strause Brothers (pretentiously listed in the credits as “The Brothers Strause”) were visual effects artists, so I figured it would look good, but I also knew that their only other feature is Alien vs. Predator: Requiem, so I figured not to expect much else. Turns out I was right on the money about both.

What it’s about:

Apparently beings so highly advanced, when compared to us, that they can construct flying machines that will cross interstellar distances are somehow concerned with little old Earth. They emerge from the clouds in their giant-ass vehicles and begin shining a strange blue light everywhere that turns humans into zombies, and then they suck them up, yum yum. They wreak havoc in L.A., and presumably the rest of the world, and there doesn’t seem to be much anyone can do to stop them. Or is there? (no)

The Good:

As I said above, the film looks fabulous. The Strause brothers did not make bank in Hollywood over the decade because they don’t know how to create a damned fine image. The photography is good, the camera placement and movements are good, and the aliens obviously look excellent. There is really never a time when you don’t believe what’s on screen. They throw everything from spaceships to tentacled marauders to huge-ass stomping alien creatures our way. There are even a few surprises and some nicely creepy visuals. Lots of people get their heads removed for them, which is a bit of a predilection I have in my monster movies (that sounds sort of sick, but it is what it is). There is also a distinct Lovecraftian vibe to the large aliens. Never a bad thing.

The Bad:

The story portion of the film is a total fizzle. The cast is The Attack of the Television Actors, and while all the players are people whose work I have enjoyed, none of them, except my man Eric Balfour, belong in a film. And even Balfour is made to look stupid with the weak script and choppy direction. The Strause’s can direct action and craft awesome aliens, but they can’t evoke convincing portrayals from their actors. There was really not an honest emotional beat in the whole movie. And as we all know, without any character development no one is going to give two shits what happens to said characters. There was never a single drop of tension anywhere in this pointless movie, and the bombastic music was a key that they knew it, and were trying to drum up suspense using that cheap ploy.

Basically it was all shades of ID4, The Matrix, and a whole scene lifted directly out of Spielberg’s War of the Worlds. Once the action got started it was apparent that no one had any idea where to go with it, and so it mainly just sat there stewing in its own juices. It felt like Lord of the Rings: it kept going on every time I thought it was going to end. Wait until video for this one. When it’s in the Redbox. And you have a coupon. And you’ve watched everything else.

Trivia:

Apparently this film was entirely self-funded by the Strause brothers and was mostly filmed in and around their condo complex. Which just goes to show that no matter how much money and expertise you throw at the screen, it will not make up for a derivative story, a weak script, and characters who are little more than ciphers. I cannot imagine for the life of me why they thought this movie was worthy of their own personal finances. They could have invested in a string of really awesome low budget efforts instead, and given the cinematic world some originality. Oh well.